Lucky Number 7

No one could accuse me of being a sucker for a lucky number. Some years back, a psychic scared me off from all otherworldly notions. Let’s just say that he did not see money for me in the near future, but he did see a plumber. I wasn’t put off by the idea of a manual laborer as I have proposed marriage to the same electrician for 30 years. (He is just being difficult about the first-cousin thing.)

After that one horrific reading, I was not about to have lucky days or tarot cards or allow my child to have a Ouija board. But all that changed when I realized this is my seventh anniversary with Atlanta Homes & Lifestyles. Yikes! Now, everywhere I look there are sevens. First, there’s my birthday—in July, of course—and my address. Sevens, again. Sevens are the style numbers on my new collection of handbags. My number at the Tepper Auction Gallery is 707, my phone number has three sevens and my beloved Momma Jojo just hit 70! What’s up with that? I owe the IRS $17,000 (well, that isn’t exactly good news but, hey, it is a sign)!

Some might say that the tax bill is a sign that I need to spend less, but I just bought a Nanette Lapore velvet jacket on Gilt Groupe for 70 bucks, so that, too, must be a sign. Even Turtle Pie, my precious French Bulldog, is seven months old.

There are portents and signs everywhere. But what can I do with this newfound knowledge and power? I’ve decided I need to start harnessing the “Power of Seven.” Even with spring here, I need seven new blankets. Because of my hot flashes, our apartment is Arctic cold, and Anabelle is complaining of frostbite. I will not turn on the heat. And that reminds me: I need seven shots of Botox. After that much-needed facial rejuvenation, I will be needing a seven-day vacation in Jamaica. Can someone kindly alert my favorite resort to the fact that I will not be able to pay that rack rate of 300 bucks a day? I’m thinking something like $70 would be fair. It is a magic number, after all, and since my dog is forbidden on that tiny island I will need seven nights of free dog sitting.

When I get back, I’m going to need new outfits for every day—voilà, seven again! To achieve that, I’m also going to need 700 of my closest friends to go to the online discount shopping sites where you get 25 bucks for each referral (no sevens there, but I’ll take it anyway). It is my seventh anniversary, after all. So much to do and I’m already exhausted. How about a 7UP?